The Great American Hockey Shirt Contest

Hello proud Americans.

If you follow us on Twitter (as is your patriotic duty) you might have noticed that over the past several weeks we’ve been asking people to contribute to something of an “art project,” while providing very little else in the way of details.

Well, now has come the time to reveal what we’ve been working on, with the help of six extraordinary American heroes:

Yes, we’re making t-shirts.

Now, before you think we’ve sold out, or are trying to monetize the obviously-great idea behind this site, please don’t misunderstand. A significant portion of every dollar we get (after our costs, etc.) will be donated to the USA Hockey Foundation.

The organization, just by way of introduction, works to improve USA Hockey in six very distinct ways: Through “participation, opportunity, safety, player development, education and commemoration.” So if you end up supporting American hockey with a Sleeping Giant shirt, you’re also supporting USA Hockey with a donation. That’s a good thing for you to do.

This whole idea occurred to us some time ago, when we realized that the coming hockey season will bring not one but TWO opportunities for America to embarrass Canada and every other awful country in the hockey world. First, as always, comes World Juniors at the end of December and beginning of January, where the US will surely repeat as gold medalists and extend Canada’s hilarious streak of not-medaling.

Then, just a month and a half later, will be the granddaddy of all hockey tournaments: The Olympics. Is that something you should be taking off work for right this second? We submit that it is.

So with this in mind, we figured it was time to kick our patriotism up to the next level; it’s not enough to only support American hockey by visiting this site and making fun of any Canadians you have the misfortune of knowing, but also wearing a shirt to illustrate this great nation’s dominance over that other one’s.

FUN UPDATE: Here I am talking about this contest on Sirius/XM’s NHL Network channel. What a world.

And so without further ado, here are the designs submitted by a number of wonderful patriots from all over our great nation (though you’ll notice they’re basically all variations on the Sleeping Giant’s tentpole theme). What we need you to do, in the meantime, is vote for them and find out which one will be the Official Shirt of the Sleeping Giant.

(Also we should note that the artist behind the winning design receives $50 and a free shirt and we’ll probably give something to all the “losers” too because no American is truly a loser. However, even the winningest Canadian of all time is still human garbage compared to the losingest American. It’s all relative, you see.)

Okay, here goes:

Entry No. 1, courtesy of Ann Frazier:

Sleeping-Giant-2Entry No. 2, also from Ann:

Sleeping-GiantEntry No. 3, from Dan Saraceni:

Eagle Body Slam Proof - BLUE

Entry No. 4, also from Dan:

Eagle Circle Proof - BLUE

Entry No. 5, from Matt Lubchansky:sleepy

And finally, here’s Entry No. 6, from Eric Kochanski:


So there you have it. We’ll leave voting open for an indeterminate but relatively short amount of time, so make sure you let everyone know about this hot, hot chance to support the site and, more importantly, the future success of ice hockey right here in the good ol’ US of A!

Which wonderful design do you most want on your cool and great torso?

  • No. 6 (Muhammad Ali eagle) (35%, 344 Votes)
  • No. 1 (Elbow drop eagle) (27%, 265 Votes)
  • No. 4 (Circle eagle) (13%, 130 Votes)
  • No. 2 (Sleeping Giant's seal) (11%, 112 Votes)
  • No. 5 (Victorious eagle) (8%, 74 Votes)
  • No. 3 (Body slam eagle) (6%, 59 Votes)

Total Voters: 984

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15 thoughts on “The Great American Hockey Shirt Contest

  1. If the eagle circle one wasn’t just red and white (Canada’s colors! gasp). I think that’s the best. Muhammad Ali eagle wins because of colors.

  2. I’d buy about 20 of shirt #6 if there wasn’t a Canadian Mountie in it. There are TENS of other countries we might be defeating while I wear my Sleeping Giant Shirt!

  3. Gotta go with No 1, elbow drop eagle. The illustration has the old school charm of a classic comic. Plus, the eagle’s wrestling gear, the flag, and the leaf-pondering beaver show a tongue-in-cheek humor about this serious intra-continental hockey rivalry.

    …But we can’t go wrong. All the designs are fantastic! My admiration and thanks to the designers. Can’t wait to buy.

  4. Why has this not been covered by Puck Daddy and Backhand Shelf… even if it only show up in the “links” compilation?

    Vote Elbow Drop Eagleeeeeeee, a.k.a. Derp Beaver!

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